Let The Light Shine Through

Personal, Uncategorized

Sometimes I sit down to write and the words just come to me, other times I sit here for hours and seem to delete more than I actually keep. Tonight is one of those nights. It’s one of those nights where I type and type and type but then I delete and delete and delete because I want this to mean something but I just can’t find the right words to say it.

Looking back on the last year, it is kind of astounding how much my perspective on life has changed. A year ago as a senior in college, I hid behind the facade of always having my life put together while inside I was freaking out. I was less than a month from graduation, with numerous job applications filled out and even more resumes sent out to ANY employer that would take them, yet I had no concrete plans for after I walked across that stage. I was nervous, frustrated and scared beyond belief. I didn’t want to admit that I didn’t have it all figured out. So I kept a smile on my face and pretended everything was going according to plan, while I filled out any and all applications that even remotely applied to my field.


“There is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in.”
-Leonard Cohen


I thought the world only wanted to see the perfect and as a young individual entering the work force I had to put up and shut up about how hard {and stressful} being put together really was. It wasn’t until I started to let my brokenness show that I finally started to understand that the world doesn’t need more “perfect” people, it needs people who are willing to be real and unedited. I realized that it was my ability to show my struggle that started to draw people to me. It wasn’t until I started embracing my cracks that I finally started to come to terms with how perfectly imperfect my life really was.

I got those job offers, but only after I stopped worrying about things out of my control. I started loving myself more, but only after I stopped comparing myself to the people around me. I started to actually live my life, but only after I stopped letting the people around me make the decisions for me. So you know what I really want to share? The truth.

I don’t have my life all put together. I prefer sweatpants and messy buns to business casual {or even jeans and a t-shirt} any day. I have an addiction to ice cream that is borderline obsessive compulsive. I love trashy reality TV shows, because they make me feel like I am going places in life. I am tired of the emotional abuse I put myself through when I see other people succeed because I never believe I deserve that same success. I am exhausted from trying to make myself into the person society expects me to be rather than the person I am. I am over fake social media where people only showcase life’s highlights with staged photos and generic captions rather than their real lives. I want people to share their struggles and flaws. I want the world to stop glorifying perfection and start embracing the mess that is real life.

As you go about the rest of your week, I have a challenge for you. Stop aiming to be perfect, let people see the real you, let the light shine through those cracks you have been trying so hard to hide. Life can get messy and that is okay. Embrace it. Once you start being real, you will be surprised with how many people will be drawn to you; how many people will relate to your struggles. You are not alone. No one’s life is perfect, so it is about time we stopped pretending like we don’t all binge watch Netflix while eating ice cream straight from the box because we hate doing dishes! {I can’t be the only one…}. It is about time we stop pretending that our lives are put together and that we have it all figured out, because I guarantee once you stop that is when the real fun begins.

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